I am nervous about tomorrow. Not because of the fact that I’m getting on a plane because I’ve done that many times, but because I’ll be all by myself for six weeks in California. The hassle of flying by myself (without the label of an unaccompanied minor) is also nerve wracking. The fact that it is 1 AM and I have to get going to Connecticut in three hours is making me scared.
Why am I so nervous about this trip when most people my age would be more than happy to tear themselves away from home? I hate dorm life. The whole concept of it disgusts me. I’ll never have enough privacy by sharing sleeping quarters with another person. Sure, I’ve asked to have the neatest roommate possible, but knowing me they will never be neat enough. My mother told me of the times when she was staying at a convent in England. One girl whom she particularly hated borrowed my mother’s trainers to go jogging while my mother was out. This girl also happened to buy new shoes about the same time my mother had 100 pounds stolen from her bags. I know this is rare, but I hate having my stuff left unlocked around strangers. Sure, my roommate will be someone nice, but they are still strangers who I will only know for six weeks (and judging by their autobiographies, will only be acquaintances for that time frame).
I also hate being limited with what I can use. No cosmetics. Oh goodness. This sounds terribly superficial but I need to take the time to make myself look good. Different colored eye shadows, mascaras, lip glosses, etc. I could have packed these items in luggage that will be checked in, but working in a lab with a face full of make up in Southern California just seems unpractical. Another issue will be laundry. I wear delicates like a drug addict uses crack. I never put my pants in the dryer. About 80% of my clothes are air dried to prevent damage (because that heat really wears out cloth fibers), so finding the space in a 10′ x 12′ dorm to hang my clothes will be next to impossible.
I may sound like a crazy bitch with a pole up her ass, but for goodness sake, I have a lifestyle that I am used to and changing it, even for six weeks will not work. It is an experience of a lifetime (yes, working as a free underpaid labor because los trabajores are too expensive and incompetent in chemistry) but damn, if this is what college will be like, I do not want to move out of the city.
Let’s hope I won’t be completely insane with no sleep for 40 hours.
Jose
